CRIME BLOTTER

Our crime blotter's always good for a few chuckles. In the past few days we've had several items reported, to wit:

A lab mix puppy was stolen. When they talked to a nine-year-old girl, she admitted taking the puppy. Awww. Everyone loves puppies.

A woman reported her daughter was struck in the face by an older female. The daughter says she and the older female were fighting; evidently videos prove it. At least she's honest.

A woman reported someone took her nasal spray (worth $60) from her purse. Ugh! I wouldn't want to use someone else's nose spray!

Two juveniles, male and female, attacked another juvenile in his bedroom before fleeing in a pickup truck. They were reported using alcoholic beverages. Wonder if the pickup was parked in the bedroom!

Someone stole a box of 24 cigars worth $24. Hmmm. Must not have been very good cigars.

A woman reported her Retro 3 Jordan sneakers were stolen from her apartment. At first I said, "So?" Then the value was given: $150.

A woman chased a male from her business. He was wearing two stainless steel bracelets he stole. Wonder how she would have got them off him if she'd caught him?

A man left his girlfriend's $700 iPad on a table in a business. Naturally, it got gone. Bet if it had been his iPad he wouldn't have left it lying around!

And an officer had a suspect steal his taser but retrieved it before it got used on him. Bet he'll be more careful with his questioning next time!

Ah, the joys of small town papers! I only wish they'd name names!